I am going to busy myself, find some new hobbies, get use to doing things alone again. I am going to miss having him in my life a lot. Time will heal my broken heart. Will I ever get back into a serious relationship? More than likely not. Like I told him years ago if he wasn’t it then I wasn’t going to have anything long term.  I actually don’t even want to date at all. I’m sick of heartaches and heart breaks. I really thought he was it.

Now is my time to find myself again. I got lost in the relationship and kept my head up for so long. Now that I’ve been defeated like a bad guy in a video game it’s time to start from the beginning again and figure out what makes me happy all over again.

I’ve actually been thinking about trying to have from friends over and playing video games while live streaming… I have some ideas… 😉  I think I am going to go ahead and get my LLC. I will continue to look for a house so that I can start up my own business.

At the moment the one thing I’m having the hardest time with so far is not contacting my ex. He was my best friend, someone to talk to about anything. I just wish he tried to save us before I had gotten so bitter over him choosing money and work over me all the time. Did he think I was just talking out of my ass when I would tell him how miserable I was for all those years? How can things change overnight just because he wanted to come in town to see me.

I really need to try to find a way to get over the bitterness of the whole situation. No one should ever make anyone feel like their feelings aren’t valid. 😦


I get my S8 today so I am in a decent mood. More to come. Got some work to do.

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