It seems as if every time I take off a HALF day at work once I find out when my doctor is out I get in trouble. On top of everything else I just can’t get out of this funk that I am in. I continually have been feeling overwhelmed. I need to find a work from home position so I don’t have to deal with people anymore.
I feel like giving up every day. When will the feeling end?
I guess its time to start kayaking and getting outside more, I really wish I had a paddle board…. I need to take my dogs with me to White Rock and see if they will get in the lake.
I am going to have to make some major life changes pretty soon. I have just hit the 12 month mark to being back in Texas by myself. Thing will have to start changing here in the next couple months for things in my life to stay the same. I am done waiting around, I am done being sad, I am done listening to someone who just wants to bitch at me for what I do. I feel a change coming on because I am starting to not give a fuck any more.
Honestly I really don’t care anymore if I have to do my walks alone. I would rather do them alone than force someone to do something good for themselves as well as their health. Fuck it and you basically.
Fuck everyone at this point in my life honestly; besides my families.
How can I meet new people now? I need to start going out to restaurants by myself and sitting at the bar while having dinner. Corner seat so I have more open range to everyone around me. But most people sitting alone at bars are men and I need to find female friends who actually want to hang out instead of just mention it and never do anything about it.
I miss having my once a week dinner at new restaurants. I guess I will need to start that again this year. I will just have to find a foodie that isn’t picky like me. Also, someone who likes adventures so we can go rent a cabin with my or our animals and relax out of town for a weekend.
Schlitterbahn in New Braunfels has been calling my name recently. I am hoping to get out there at some point even if its not this year.
First I must focus on finding true female friends who want me to be in their life, like a constant friend rather than someone you think of last. I know I’m not a kid person but now that most of my friends kids are finally turning 10 or so maybe we can start doing things like Six Flags, you have to start the kids early so that they aren’t scared of roller coasters. My niece was scared of the back and forth ship at the fair, the easiest ride on the planet. Her little brother was fine who is like half her age. I don’t like seeing things like that.
Since I’ve been really getting into my Halloween costume for this year and am already buying my accessories and wig I just cant wait to finish the whole outfit, but it will be closer to October before I finish now. I just have some extra money from my tax return and paid off a credit card so the rest went to me.
COMIC-CON is in a few weeks. I need to find a buddy to go with me. Maybe we can find some cheap cosplay and do the damn thing this time.
I have also been trying to find a image of some artwork for a tattoo I want next on my lower leg, but then again I’ve already found one for my outer buttock and part of my upper upper thigh.
Anyway, I’ve written enough about the bad juju and feelings I’ve been having. Maybe my next post will be uplifting. I guess all we can really do is wait and see what actually happens next.
Also, I’ve already bought my Incubus tickets for Starplex Pavilion, Dallas if anyone wants to join me there.
Also I have great coupons to Medieval Times.